'Run a race, climb a mountain or join a circus'

A year ago I was feeling stressed, fed up and was getting annoyed and upset regularly.

I was a pain to live with and I was struggling at work. At my lowest point, I was sat on the west platform at Hackney Central station crying my eyes out. I had no idea why, so I went to see my GP and we talked things through.

He said he thought that while I was clearly controlling my blood sugars well and achieving all the medical attainments (good eyesight, no foot troubles, excellent HbA1c), I had not come to terms psychologically with having the condition.

My GP said I might be depressed and that my problem was frustration. I no longer could be entirely the person I was and my life had changed.

Diabetes is a change and because of how I used to live my twenty-something life (booze, junk food, general disorganisation and chaos), it was not an easy one for me to accept, in spite of the fact that on the face of things I was doing ‘all the right things’.

He told me that the best way to deal with frustration was to exercise. Something to do with endorphins. It sounded strange at the time but I took his word for it.

My girlfriend entered us into the Great North Run to raise money for Diabetes UK and we started running. And running and running.

It was heartbreaking. I’ve always enjoyed sport but have never really been that fit. I had to worry about being tired and having low blood sugar, and sometimes I didn’t know the difference.

After two weeks I wanted to stop. I was having regular hypos the day after running and the insulin regime it had taken me a year to devise was being totally disrupted. And, of course, I was just finding the running really, really tiring. But I persevered.

After a while things got easier and I was able to run for an hour and roughly predict the effect it would have on me over the following 24 hours. I trained three or four times a week and joined a gym. That was a big step. I had been ideologically opposed to gyms in the past. I finished the training and managed the race in two-and-a-half hours.

Since I started training and particularly since I ran the race I have felt a lot better. My girlfriend has noticed the difference. Less toddler-style tantrums, less moping, more enthusiasm to get up in the mornings, and, crucially for both of us, more sex. I definitely feel happier and less angry and frustrated. I think for the first time in two years I might be genuinely beginning to accept that I have diabetes and that I can live with it.

I’m not going to preach to you about the benefits of exercise. But I do want to explain one thing. Since I started exercising three to four times a week I think about my blood sugar control totally differently.

I focus less now on what I eat and more on how active I’m being. I think about my insulin intake in terms of what I’ve got on and how much exercise I’m going to do, rather than focussing so hard on food.

I have become less food obsessed and have found that I can actually eat more of the things I like because I’m so much more active. Because I’m exercising more I need to test my sugar levels more regularly, so I do it up to eight or nine times a day. It no longer seems a hassle like it used to and of course it helps my control.

Exercise has not just made me healthier through its own benefits, but it has changed my attitude to my treatment and made me feel more in charge of things. I don’t think my GP knew that his suggestion would have had this much of an impact, but I thank him for it nonetheless.

Change is really the key I think. In a small way you do have to redefine who you are and what you do as a diabetic. Doing something new as a diabetic is important. Diabetes is change, and, whether you think it’s good or bad, if you want to cope you have to change with it, not just in habit but in attitude.

The idea that you can achieve something that you had not done before you were diagnosed is uplifting and you start to see having diabetes in a whole new light.

It is no longer the obstacle that makes the things you used to do that little bit harder. It is the reason to go and try new things and push yourself further than you did before. And the benefit of all this is that along the way you are probably helping yourself to deal with the condition better both physically and psychologically.

What I advise is this. Go out and run a race, climb a mountain or join a circus. Do something that you’ve never done before and that you never thought you would ever do. It’s important for everyone, but it’s even more important for you.