I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes in April of this year.
I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes in April of this year. It was the biggest shock of my life. I hadn't ever been ill before and then to be hit with a life long health problem was out of the blue. I'd been feeling generally tired for months, but I just put that down to being at university and prioritising partying before sleep, I was constantly thirsty, and whilst I knew this was odd, to the extent I was doing it clandestinely, it didn't ring any alarm bells, and I was losing weight, despite eating loads, which I just put down to being lucky.
One evening I was out in my university bar and in the toilets I saw a poster listing all of the symptoms of Type 1 diabetes. Suddenly everything clicked and I burst into tears. I told my friends and they all told me I was being silly.
A month later I was in hospital after having a blood test at my GP and a blood sugar of 37. After a week of having various needles stuck in me and being trained to do it myself I was free to go home.
I went straight back to my University house, adamant that I could do this by myself, moping at my parents house wouldn't solve anything.
My friends and boyfriend all rushed around straight away, all wanting to know what they could do to help. There was even a facebook group started to guess my blood sugar levels of the day. They all embarked upon a sugar free week with me in solidarity so I wouldn’t be an outcast. With out the support of them I would be coping a lot less than I am now, but it's still a struggle.
It sounds stupid, but occasionally I feel myself welling up when I'm offered cake and have to say no, or when all my friends are eating ice cream and I'm there with a small banana.
When my sugars aren't what they should be I used to feel as if I had failed, if I got upset I'd feel as if I'd failed, that I was useless because I wasn't coping, I didn't want to be labelled as a diabetic. Six weeks after I was diagnosed I went into shock and cried for three hours. After then I've learnt that it's so much better to let your feelings out than to keep them in. Six months in and it still doesn't seem that real. I'm getting better and a lot happier with it too. I'm Holli again now, or sugar puff to my friends.