Being diagnosed

Being diagnosed with diabetes can be a very difficult time. It is usual to have a mixture of feelings, particularly shock at being told you have diabetes, anger at how this could have happened to you, guilt – did you do something wrong? Not all people respond in the same way, some may feel relief at finally being able to put a name to what has been causing them to feel so unwell.

Diagnosis is often the time when a lot of information is given and this can leave people feeling overwhelmed and confused. It is often at this point that you first find out about the possible complications associated with diabetes and this can be frightening for anyone.

These responses and feelings are common and natural. There is no right or wrong way to react. It may be hard to absorb every piece of information in the beginning. Emotions can affect what you hear and how much you remember. Take one step at a time. It may help to collect written information to read later at your own pace.

If you forget something or are confused, don’t be afraid to ask your diabetes team to explain things to you again.

After diagnosis

In the weeks following diagnosis, emotions are often neglected as you get to grips with new treatment routines and lifestyle adjustments. Nevertheless, feelings are just as important. They can be confusing and intense.

The stress of a daily diabetes routine can also cause resentment. People often experience feelings of loss – the loss of their usual life that didn’t include taking medication, injecting insulin, testing blood glucose levels and having a more structured lifestyle. There are no days off for some and they often feel that their diabetes has taken over their lives.

It is important to recognise the new demands on your life, which may seem like an added burden to an already busy life. You may feel set apart from your friends and family because of all the extra responsibility. Very often family and friends treat you differently because of your diabetes: “Are you sure you should be eating that?” or “Is that ok for people with diabetes?”. Talking to your diabetes care team and having the support of your family and friends can often help to ensure that you are in control of your diabetes and it isn’t controlling you or making you feel isolated.

Dealing with diabetes complications

Unfortunately, people with diabetes are at risk of developing long-term complications, such as damage to the eyes, kidneys, nerves and heart. It is likely to come as a shock to be told you are at risk of one or more of these complications. You may feel there is no hope for the future and it is usual for your first thoughts to be on the worst aspect.

Listening to other people’s experiences can often help. It can be comforting to listen to people who are already living with diabetes and all these emotions. Talking to others through diabetes support or voluntary groups can help to see how others have lived healthy lives with diabetes, what their feelings are about complications and how they deal with them.

You may feel cheated if you have done all the right things and have been working hard to get your diabetes under control and you develop complications. Having good diabetes control reduces your risk of developing long-term complications but does not always remove the risk entirely.

Don’t ever give up – the rewards are worth fighting for. – Person with diabetes

Small steps that can help you

• Don’t isolate yourself because of your diabetes.
• It’s ok to feel like this; don’t be hard on yourself for how you are feeling.
• Try to continue to do things that you enjoy and give you pleasure. Just because you have diabetes does not mean you have to stop doing the things you enjoy.
• Set small and specific goals.
• Talk to your diabetes care team; let them know how you are feeling.
• Break down large tasks into small ones.
• Try to confide in someone – it’s usually better than being alone. Talk to your family and friends, they may be unaware of how you are feeling.
• When someone asks: “How are you feeling?” don’t be afraid to tell them what you really feel.

Reviewed December 2009
Next review December 2010